Babies and very young children interact with the world physically and emotionally. While children cannot understand the faith at this young age, they can develop habits that will grow into understanding later. The important task for parents of children at this age is to create the atmosphere within which the habits of faith can be formed and to begin forming those habits as their children grow. Forming the faith environment of your family begins as a married couple before you even have children.

Participating in the life and mission of the Church begins even before you have children. Babies and toddlers will benefit from an atmosphere of faith that makes God the center of family activity and relationships. Because the family is the first place children are introduced to Jesus, it is often referred to in Church documents as the “Domestic Church.” Your children will begin their walk with God by observing your walk. They will take their first steps with your guidance. Here are some recommendations for making your family the Domestic Church – before you have children and while your children are very young.

Lay Early Groundwork for Family Prayer

• Become familiar as a couple with spontaneous and traditional prayers.
• Adopt a sacramental as a couple and bathe your home in prayer.
  • Put up holy water fonts and bless yourself each morning and night.
  • Use blessed salt – you can sprinkle it in each room as a blessing or add it to your food as a mealtime prayer.
  • Use a blessed crucifix for your prayer together and for your family prayer.
  • Get your rosaries blessed and pray the Holy Rosary together.
• Adopt some family devotions. A few possible devotions are
  • Devotion to the Sacred Heart
  • Marian devotion
  • House blessing
  • Devotion to particular saints
  • Chaplets such as the Chaplet of Divine Mercy or the Chaplet of Saint Michael the Archangel.
• Let your children see you study the faith! Find an interesting and fun bible study to do as a married couple.
• Let your children see you pray every day! Possible daily prayers include:
  • Meal prayers (before & maybe even after)
  • Rosary
  • Chaplet of Divine Mercy
  • Liturgy of the Hours (you can pray along with a recording at divineoffice.org)
  • Lexio Divina
  • Reading & Gospel of the day
• Practice prayer with children according to their age (two year olds are more capable than you might think!).
  • Practice the sign of the cross early and often.
  • Say easily memorized prayers before important events: travel, searching for something lost, going to bed, starting the day
  • Help your children become familiar with sacramentals – use holy water in the home, let them play with (durable) rosaries
• The beginning of character development is respect for others: teach your children manners – please, thank you – as soon as they start learning to speak.

Get the Family Involved in the Mass

Babies and toddlers benefit greatly from frequent exposure to Mass. While they don’t understand or even pay attention to everything that happens in the Mass, they can have fun participating in parts of it and they will become comfortable in church if they go often. Here are some ways to get them involved:

• Dedicate yourself to Sunday Mass every week – show your children that God is the first priority in your life.
• Take your children to Mass as often as possible.
• Engage infants by singing and dancing during hymns, pointing out the priest’s activities during Mass, and playing with them (just don’t get carried away).
• As your children grow older, encourage them to participate as much as they can . . .
  • Draw their attention to the elevation of the Eucharist after consecration. This is especially if your parish rings bells – you can draw their attention to the bells first, then eventually teach them to say something like, “Thank you, Jesus,” during the elevation.
  • Encourage your children to sing – even if they don’t know the tune or the words.
  • Encourage your children to learn “Alleluia,” “Holy, Holy” and other simple Mass parts.
  • Help your children identify one or two favorite parts of the Mass (one two-year-old likes when the priest washes his hands – she tells her parents, “Hands! Hands!” – and when the priest purifies the vessels after Communion – she says, “Messy!” and then, “All clean!” when the priest sits down.

Keep in mind, especially with active toddlers, the goal of the Mass for them is engagement, not necessarily silence or adult behavior. Most people are very forgiving for usual child antics. Unnecessary and futile attempts at complete control will only frustrate you, your child, and your fellow parishioners. Here are some pointers:

• Focus older children on the Mass – don’t try to distract them with food and toys unless absolutely necessary.
• Holding children focuses their attention more than letting them roam the pews.
• Treat the cry room as a temporary respite to get your child under control – not as a playroom.
• Keep consequences simple – corner time at the back of the church or in the cry room.
• Keep your standards balanced – don’t expect adult behavior from a two-year-old!

Make Your Physical Home Reflect the Domestic Church

Atmosphere is so important in creating devotion in children and adults alike. Imagine the impact on children of a home that reflects the centrality of God paired with habits of Mass and prayer observed in their parents. There is a great variety of art and decor that can reflect God:

• Home decoration can include pictures of saints or holy items, icons from the eastern traditions, crucifixes, statues, and saint art.
• Reserve a specific place in your home for prayer – maybe even create a family altar.
• Display and use sacramentals in your home – holy water fonts, blessing the house with blessed chalk, rosaries, etc.

These of course are just some suggestions. There are many ways to instill the faith in young children. You know what fits your family’s style of devotion and as the primary educators of your children you will touch their faith lives in a unique way. The key is to realize the importance of starting immediately. Surround your child with God’s love and with examples of the faith. Don’t forget that the most important tool at your disposal is your own powerful example. Children begin watching their parents at a very young age!